2009 - what a year!

I’m ALIVE! Kicking and still going strong. 

2009 was a year of learning. I learned to listen to my inner voice. I listened deep and long. I learned to meditate, to block out noises and unhealthy thoughts. I learned who friends are, who supported me and who pretended. That hurt a lot but the same time I am thankful I saw the truth. I also learned the power of love.

In June I also realized that I was not going to continue my pre-school teaching degree as this isn’t what I wanted in life. This was something I had to release and let go. Then the next hurdle came – what do I really really want to do. I listened again to my inner voice, told the universe what I wanted and voila, I am studying what I really love. Distance. Via the internet. Thank god for technology.

2009. The days rolled by.. time and tide waits for no man. I watched my son grow;  we did many things the three of us together.  We sowed seeds for the balcony box and his tomato plants, we were out in the woods a lot plucking blueberries in the summer. I also discovered a new craze – jigsaw puzzles!

I learned that no matter how much I love, sometimes God loves them more. In august my beloved godfather left us to be with God.. he died in his sleep and he probably didn’t suffer much. I take that as a consolation. I’ve got a lifetime of memories to get me by. All the holidays, the jokes,.. Doc, you are forever in my heart. My godmother needs time to heal and I’ve given her all the space she needs.. i miss her terribly though.

October 2009 I fulfilled a childhood dream. We were in Oslo for a weekend holiday. I didn’t get to see all the fjords but it doesn’t matter. I know we’ll go there again. 

I let go.
I released all tension.
I released all fear.
I released all anger.
I released all guilt.
I released all sadness.
I let go of all old limitations

I am peace with myself.
I am at peace with the process of life.
I am safe.

It took a while to feel the way I feel but it was worth the sweat, the pain, everything.